I'm more than ready to be finished this fucking endless semester. My comittment and fortitude had been running on empty for quite sometime now. One final finished, on more assignment and 2 finals to go. Thank sweet jesus for my holocaust class being over and done with. And just for the record we talked about the *actual* holocaust death camps ONCE! ONCE!!! WTF is that??? if you name the class something, maybe you should teach me something about it.....but hey, I'm no prof. Who am I to judge.
In other news, I'm going to a restaurant where it's a huge haunted house that's interactive and they perform crazy shows all night....I have heard that they throw food at you and stab the table...amazing. I'm quite looking forward to that. As Sonal knows, eating just isn't the same unless something bizarre is going o and maybe someone is yelling at you. How regressive is that>?
so yeah, back to home coming.
My brother and Carelton are probably coming to get me on the 14th so I should be home afterthat weekend.
I Expect the following to happen during my holidays:
1) A lack of bullshit drama and good happy x-mas feelings.
2) Lots of stupid holiday happenings ie tobogganing and making x-rated snowpeople, hopefully aided by booze
3)A LOT of eating, drinking, swearing and making out
4) some quality time with my closest and dearest
Please say that you can all join in on these wonderful ideas to make this x-mas one of the best.

PS if anyone has some good ideas for ridiculous games/antics that we should do over the holidays, i'd love to hear them. I'm brainstorming away as well :)

Miss you kids.
~K

Current Mood: hungry

Sonal can drink like a fucking champion. She put as much away as I did, mixed drinks, never said "i'm ok" to the offer of a drink, stayed up till 7 in the morning talking with me and then got up bright eyed an hour and a half later.
This lady is amazing, and a 5 star, 4 alarm drinking partner.
*love*

Current Mood: impressed
Current Music: Bitches ain't Shit- Ben Folds Five (best song EVER)

So this past week has been a God sent. Maybe it's the universe beginning to balance all the crap I've had to go through over the past 4-ish months, but whatever is going on I'm riding it as far as possible....
Sonal came down for 3 days. I don't think I can appropriatly describe how AMAZING the time was that she spent here. I know that people can become fast friends but I truly have never experienced quite as intense a connection as quickly as what happened. I've been waiting to experience this city with someone who could get as enthusiastic and drunk and excited as possible. This, we totally accomplished. And then some. SO much laughing, SO much good food, SO much recklessness, the best conversation I've had in awile and a thrilled abandon that made me totally fall in love with her and the city (even more so!)Totally the experience I've been waiting with baited breath for...It was so so sad to see her go. I miss you so much dear!
My mom came down the day after Sonal left (apparently everyone waits for the exact same moment to visit, which doesn't help me in my quest to catch up in school) but it was fantastic to see her. She came down with her bf with TONNES of food (yes, no spending money on groceries!!)and her bf stabbed my freezer lining trying to scrape the ice out. so yeah, i get a brand new fridge which is awesome since mine is tiny and has had 3,000,000 people use it before me. Grody. We spent the week shopping and eating out for every meal, went to the BioDome where i saw tiny, tiny monkeys (!!!!) and penguins having sex. Which freaked me out and now they're not as cute as I initially had thought. Fucking exhibitionist sluts.
So yeah. On top of all this greatness I got 2 amazing marks back today. Life is brilliant and I'm pretty sure I'm going to get karmically punished for even acknowledging all of this good fortune. Keep your fingers crossed for me
(See you all in 3 weeks!!!)

Current Location: Bliss
Current Mood: giddy
Current Music: Sleater Kinney - I want to be your Joey Ramone

Whatta bizzare life situation these days.
It seems like nothing has stayed the same from what i took as commonplace 4 months ago. Nothing then seems safe anymore, but I suppose that's what growth is. Never easy, always uncomfortable, difficult and in the end pretty painful. I can attest to that in ever sort of way. No longer fucking depressed to the hilt, maybe because Sonal's here!!!!!! It's been the amazing vacation I have dreamed of having. We're eating amazing food, going to incredible bars and having the best time I could have imagined. Sweet tits I've waiting for this. I will go into detail of the fuckng crazy restaurant we went to tonight (facist gay vegan restaurant with no menu and HAVE to clean your plate or you will deal with either pay a fine or get banned from the restaurant. It looked like a dream/david lynch film/acid trip) and the bar (gay, 6 floors, and hilarious pool games)
I love everything right now. You kids need to come down. I have so much to show you.
Fuck I miss you
(Rae, I want to come to the feminist road trip in April (?) talk to me about it!!!)
LOVE LOVE LOVE

Current Location: thrilled, drunk., in bed with Sonal
Current Mood: bouncy
Current Music: High Voltage!!!!

I think I'm at the point where I need to sort things out with a hard copy in front of my face...Seems like it's always an in-opportune moment to vent or I'm just the ever-lasting emotional recluse....
Why didn't I have a diary as a girl...it may have helped head this insanity off at the pass....that and i find it terribly embarassing to write my thoughts down. Comparably to watching yourself cry in the mirror. Unsettling.
I'm having grand struggle in existing these days. Dunno whether I overshot this whole "i'm so clever and being opressed by Waterloo, must escape!" kind of thing... I'm just always feeling messy and juvinile....I miss the days of being cock sure. I sure miss those days...Every day is a battle to be sure, I have never been without a sense of "belonging" in my entire life...no one to relate to, to fall back on, to feel comforted and close to.At every moment I can't decide whether I'm becoming more steel hearted, strengthened or on the cusp of a fucking meltdown. I feel like I should be sinking my teeth into the soft belly of this city. But instead I just regress. Trying to make a nest out of completly uncomfortable eliments and failing miserably. Who knew it would be this much of a test

Current Mood: intimidated

We're doing very poorly on this blog thing. Or maybe we all just feel too boring when we sit down and try and bang something out....be that as it may I still wanna hear all the boring from you kids.
As for me, I just got back from home a few days ago....returned with some good ol Strep Throat so I've been in an incredible haze of heavy medicating for the past 3 days solid. And I missed too much school dicking around so i can't do it now.....unfortunate.
I'm so ready for this semester to be over. I'm just glad I get a "re-do" semester for this year. Something that i can try and sink my teeth into and see if i really want this bad enough....I have no idea at this point. Serves me right for thinking that getting into school would solve some kinds of existential crises. Apparently it just makes you loath a different kind of institution and question why you thought working, drinking and dancing was such a terrible life to begin with....
Le sigh
Anywho, when ever you kids get a can get up here, please do. I need a good time in Montreal. Set me straight on this path of assimilating into a city I love but is such a cold bitch to me....

Current Mood: crushed

My life is....funny.
I'm now into the full swing of school. Papers and essays and overly particular profs. I just finished my Marx paper. Anyone who's been talking to me know what kind of a feat this was. Nearly broke me. But apparently, as I'm finding out, that's all school does.It tries to break you, you kick it's ass and forget for a moment in the bliss of overcoming a huge personal obstacle that you just paid about $100 for the whole experience. Maybe I should just invest in a dominatrix. Half the pain, twice the fun.
I'm sure I'll regale all of you with many stories of my first month in Montreal, but here's a lil teaser...
I've met, gay hairstlist campers, an amature wrestler, a white rapper with a record contract that redoes Johnny Cash's Cocaine Blues (Hillarious!), and a really rich gino who's becoming a weird facet in my life and who got me a job(which I probably won't keep) playing with meat....Why are things so bizarre.
I CANNOT WAIT to come home and get drunk with all your asses.
I don't know how much time I'll have, but I'm totally maximizing every second I have there.
Miss you all so so so much
(and thank you Mike for your Marx-ing assistance. It would have fucked me dry in the ass without your sweet lube of helpfulness)

Current Mood: accomplished
Current Music: Republic of Safety- I Like To Work ;)

So, let's see, what happened in the past week or so....
I went through a serious case of homesick-y bed ridden depression (yeah I'm a pussy, so what) AND there was a shoot out at a school 3 blocks from my home! Wahooooo
yeah, everyone apparently was flipping that I was somehow involved. But alas, I have no guns regestered... (what, too soon?)
So things have been exciting I suppose. I'm finally in the head space of doing actual school and loving what I wake up to everyday. There should be more drinking involved but I'm sure that will come sooner or later. Lindsay has been taking super care of me when I'm forlorn and miserable, like making me delicious breakfasts and dinners whenever I'm over there, picnic study dates in the park and just general good company. I also was introduced to a friend of hers know as Gypsy Pit. She's an awesome lil hippy chick who made us a tasty vegan dinner and is thrilled about bring me to meet all the hot gay girls of Montreal, since she is all over the sexual identity map too. So I'm sure good times will be had between the incovienience of school. I'm also *really* having to look for a job soon, as my not having a flow of income is fucking terrifying. Who knows what I can do in this god forsaken bi-lingual town but I'm sure it'll be glamourous like sweeping up pubic hair and disposing of used condoms as a "french maid".
Ah, why can't someone pay me for being fucking awesome?
Thanksgiving is approaching fast and I'm looking forward to coming home for a visit. I miss the fam pretty terribly. LIZ, you should call me and let me know when you're coming down and what your plans are for the holiday. I don't know if it's safe to leave my # on here so e-mail me sometime soonish! Who cares about not having any real plans right now, dear. You've earned some down time and you should be enjoying it.
Rae, I totally beat your ass at Bejeweled... although I'm sure it won't last for long.
Hope Dad is getting better with each passing day <3
well kids keep the updates coming, even if they're uneventful, it makes me happy to hear from you
LOVELOVELOVE
OH PS- I live beside this Masonic Temple, it's huge and beautiful. and one night I'm in bed and I hear singing...I think it's drunk Frosh. I stick my head out the window and can look into thier Hall and it's a bunch of men chanting....and it sounds like a version of Oh My Darling Clemintine. Scary. That song's been in my head for days now...just wait until I hear the virgin sacrifices....

Current Mood: accomplished
Current Music: Sweet Clemintine

Slowly but surely this place is starting to feel like home. Not a place I've been brought up in, but a place I'm forging on my own. It's amazing and freeing and frightening all the time.
Today I had one class that lasted 20 minutes instead of the 2 1/2 hours as it's supposed to. so instead of going back to my home I decided to break out of my comfort zone and go exploring. I went through this little cafe in my main building and stumbled upon the orientation party. It was this huge area out in the sun which had a huge BBQ pit and a crowd surrounding a (seemingly) middle eastern band and kids dancing in full costume. It was pretty amazing... After watching them through a cigarette i ventured into some kind of delecious food festival with about 10 different booths of all different ethnicities, shwarma and baklava and amazing foods all around. I'm definitly going back tomorrrow to gorge myself since it's my day off.
I continued n and decided to check out the student run organic food shop. They run a free vegan lunch everyday so when I've spent too much of my loan on Jack and Cokes I'll still be fed in the long run. Then i went to this little house on Mackay St which has all these amazng houses that look like something out of Britain that have classes or student run clubs. The one that I went to is called Centre 2110. It's basically an organization that does counselling, workshops, discussion groups etc for sex workers, immigrants, the deaf, queer/bi/gay, transgendered, transsex, low income, women etc....it's pretty lovely and I applied to volunteer. It's 45 hours of training to become a counsellor so I have an interview on Thursday. I'm pretty stoked. As if I'm getting "involved". so crazy.
A night Lindsay and I got tasty pizza and a bottle of terrible deppaneure (convienience store) wine and sat on her balcony drinking, talking and watching all the drunken kids go by. Her apt it *right* across the street from Concordia and about as central as you can imagine. There's also an *AWESOME* bar across from her place that has an open bar night on Wed with $5.00 cover for chicks and plays the Ramones and the Pixies and whatnot. There ws also some pretty rockabilly boys that were going in. Hot tits.
So yeah, things are funnish. I want to meet some people, though I'm probably going to really work outside of my comfort zone. I haven't ever had to make new friends in this kind of dire situation....
wish me luck.

Rae- I'm so fucking hapy to hear your daddy's doing better. The McKnight's are a strong clan. It would take a lot more to take any of you down. send him my best and tell him next time I'm down I can be the one to make him tasty poached eggs. I've been perfecting it ;)
I miss your faces all so very much.
And some of you need to be keeping me WAY more updated. I need to know the Loo gossip bitches!! And someone let me know how Laura and Steph are doing. Their blog gives me nothing!!
Mike, I miss Cherry Oh Baby so much I can taste it!!Take care of her for me and give her a little pet of love
Love love love love.

Current Mood: bouncy
Current Music: Old delicious Veruca Salt

So things are off to a rolling start on day two of my newfound life as a "mature student". Never has that phrase been more appropriate with all the sweet young 'uns scampering around my feet.
I started my day on an uplifting note with my Holocaust class. This indeed will be the bright point of my semester, and I don't mean that in a wierd macabre kind of way. It sounds super interesting and the teacher is a sweet little grandad type of guy who's been teaching classes about genocide for like, 15 years. I'm also probably going to hit this press conference on Friday run by the Montreal Institute of Genocide and Human Rights Studies (MIGS)which is through Concordia. They're announcing that they're having Romeo Dallaire (Shake Hands With The Devil)work with MIGS for new prevention tactics for genocide. I just want to see this guy in a "seeing a rockstar" kind of way....wierd isn't it.
Anywho, other than that, Stats was terrifying mostly. I hate it and it frightens the life out of me in a way the holocaust can't. If anyone has some uplifting words about this subject, i would love to hear it because my dreams of being a sex researcher are being dampened. I guess I can always work in the peep booths ....
I also went back to the huge sex store and helped a friend with a purchase. That place is killer. They have a huge dildo that actually is a *ginormous* fist. I was impressed. I'm so surprised I haven't done any shopping here yet. I think I'm just going to wait until some of you Waterloo kids come up to see me. Shopping alone is kind of like drinking alone. I haven't started either yet, but the year is young and my loneliness could get much more rampant.
Here's to a whiskey fueled, shoe shopping, dildo-fist purchasing night soon.
Missssss youuuuuuuse all.
Ps- my little ferret face emoticons amuse the shit out of me...and to me that does not look like a horny ferret.

Current Mood: horny